SHARES
Generally, most of us recognise bullying as the unwanted negative actions of repeated intentional hurting of someone who is vulnerable. Such persons become the target because they have difficulty in defending themselves. As society becomes increasingly aware, we now understand more about bullying. Matter of fact, it encompasses more than just the use of physical superiority.
We now see three distinct types of bullying: verbal, relational, and physical.
While the physical effects of verbal and social bullying are seemingly less severe than that of the physical form, all types of bullying can potentially open the door to a myriad of other adverse consequences. These include emotional and psychological trauma, where its effects may persist into adulthood.
Furthermore, the prolonged exposure to the stress hormone cortisol from bullying can alter parts of the brain structure. Notably, the negative impact is mostly on the brain’s amygdala and hippocampus which are critical for emotional regulation.
In particular, for young children and adolescents, these negative effects become more problematic and detrimental. It is important to realise that the body’s system for handling stress is particularly sensitive during this period of development.
Singapore Ranks 3rd Highest in Bullying Cases
In a 2015 global study conducted by the Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD), Singapore ranked the third highest in terms of incidence in the world. Reports show 14.5 percent of the students suffered bullying by their peers frequently. In comparison, the OECD averages 8.9 percent.
Adolescents who bully and their victims are more likely to show a slew of typical symptoms. To enumerate, symptoms include depression and anxiety, low self-esteem, the feeling of loneliness, change of eating patterns, and loss of interest in activities. Parents and educators play a crucial role in creating a climate of support and empathy, both in and outside of schools.
Spotting the Signs
In reality, the effects of bullying can be extremely damaging to the long-term growth and development of a child. Therefore, it is important to identify the potential signs and take appropriate action to prevent these acts.
Telltale physical signs to look out for
Acts of physical bullying may be the most obvious to identify. These are some telltale signs: cuts or bruises, missing or damaged belongings. In addition, frequently coming home hungry could also be another warning sign.
Emotional and behavioural signs
Other more subtle signs include abrupt or sudden changes in your child’s behaviour and emotional expressions. For instance, look out for increased aggression at home, withdrawal from affection, frequent mood swings, decline in grades, school refusal, and avoiding social interactions.
Other signs of bullying
The way your child interacts with other children may serve as an indicator as to whether bullying is taking place. Being afraid to speak up or withdrawal from group settings may possibly indicate that bullying is happening at school or within their peer group.
What can parents do to help?
Be present
This may seem simple and intuitive, however, many of us struggle to spend sufficient time with our children. It is important to note, paying attention and being present with your children can do wonders to support their mental health. Stable emotional support from parents – listening, offering praise, affection, trust, and respect – is particularly important for adolescent victims of bullying.
Be inquisitive
More often than not, children are unlikely to report cases of bullying due to a variety of reasons. By asking questions, it may help them to open up. Some potential questions to ask are about their friends or school and how they feel. Being together helps build the rapport between you and your child, and for you to understand your child better. Note, it is important not to cause your child to feel it is an interrogation.
Be a role model
To be a role model, be aware of how we behave around our children. Make sure that we do not display behaviours of bullying such as making fun of others. How we behave not only shapes their learning and development but their outlook and behaviour. By creating a climate of trust and love conveys the message that they can trust and be themselves around us.
Roleplay
As a role model, we have the responsibility to educate and guide our children in navigating and responding appropriately to the different problems they encounter. It can be useful to go through various simulations of potential bullying situations they may face.
As an illustration, parents can ask their children how they would react, and provide them with some viable solutions or courses of action. At the same time, correct any inappropriate ways of coping or reacting. It would also be beneficial to refer to similar situations from a TV show or a movie. Let your child talk about what was done well and what could be done better. This way, your children learn how to visualize and apply the appropriate strategies correctly!
If you find that your child has trouble coping with the effects of bullying, it can be useful to seek professional help.
The article is contributed by Thrive Psychology Clinic.
About Thrive Psychology Clinic:
Here at Thrive Psychology clinic, we offer various services that can target common problems found in today’s children and youth. Our goal is to get an accurate read on your child’s experiences so that we can put together a comprehensive treatment plan that targets their unique needs. We are committed to helping children and adolescents thrive.
If you need to consult a psychologist:
Find and book an appointment with a psychologist in Singapore, on GetDoc.
by Jemima Joseph
Using words to create communities. Intrinsically passionate about people, music, and the arts. View all articles by Jemima Joseph.
