SHARES
We all talk about cancer, the patients, the causes and effects but very rarely do we take notice of the source of strength behind those determined survivors of the dreaded disease. Did you realise who it is? Yes, they are the caregivers.
Caregivers could be partners, family members, or close friends. Most often, they are not trained for the caregiver job. Most importantly, they are the lifeline of the person with cancer.
What does a caregiver do?
Apart from domestic everyday chores, they have to take care of the patient and some of the tasks include:
- Find emotional support
- Accompany patient for doctor’s appointments, tests, and treatments
- Manage medical problems at home
- Coordinate cancer care
- Decide when to seek health care or see a doctor for new problems
There may also be a cost to the caregiver’s health and well-being, but often the caregiver just keeps doing what needs to be done and may suffer in silence. You may be glad to put the well-being of the person with cancer above your own well-being. And your love for this person may give you the energy and drive you need to help them through this difficult time. Still, no matter how you feel about it, caregiving is a hard job! And many caregivers are there for their loved one 24 hours a day for months or even years.
How do you learn about this new world you have been pushed into?
One of the first steps after being told someone you love has cancer will be learning about their diagnosis. This will help you understand the disease process and get an idea of what lies ahead. Some of the first questions that you and the person with cancer should ask the doctor or the cancer care team are:
- What kind of cancer is it?
- Where is it? Has it spread beyond where it started?
- What are the treatment options? Which do you recommend?
- What’s the goal of this treatment?
- How long will treatment last? What will it be like? Where will it be done?
- What side effects should we expect?
- How will treatment affect everyday activities?
- What’s the likely long-term outcome?
Caregivers who take care of their own needs and get the information, help, and support they need are better prepared to take care of their loved ones.
Being a caregiver is a tough job, but it is an important and rewarding one, too. Today, cancer seems to be knocking on each one of our homes. Each and every one of them probably needed a caregiver at some point to help them through their cancer experience, especially the first year or 2 after diagnosis. This is when most of the treatment takes place and caregivers can be very important to its success.
Why should the caregiver take care of himself/herself?
It is hard to plan for a major health problem like cancer. It does come as a shock when you are thrust in a situation where you have to care for the person with cancer, and you are also needed to help make decisions about medical care and treatment. None of this is easy. There will be times when you know you have done well, and times when you just want to give up. This is normal.
There are many causes of stress and distress in cancer caregivers.
- Dealing with the crisis of cancer in someone you love
- The uncertain future that lies ahead
- Financial worries
- Difficult decisions that must be made
- Unexpected and unwanted lifestyle changes are just a few of them.
- Fear, hopelessness, guilt, confusion, doubt, anger, and helplessness can take a toll on both the person with cancer and the caregiver.
And while the focus tends to be on the patient, all of this affects the physical and mental health of the caregiver, too. But caregivers often focus on the person with cancer and don’t take care of themselves. You may be a caregiver, but you still have your own needs that cannot and should not be put aside.
As an outsider, how can you help the caregiver and the patient?
When we spoke to a few caregivers from different parts of the world, most of them resonated on one topic – the visitors. Friends, distant family, cousins etc. might visit people suffering from the disease but caregivers felt their presence most often brought in more negativity in everyone’s minds rather than pepping up spirits.
Visitors may or may not have been caregivers themselves so they are not in a position to advice – they end up saying negative things. So if you happen to visit someone whom you know is suffering, try to talk general stuff, say some nice words to the caregiver and pep their spirits up too. Once you pass on some positive vibes to the caregiver, it automatically transfers to the patient. Believe me it will do all of them a whole lot of good!
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by Hridya
A biochemist by education who could never put what she studied to good use, finally found GetDoc as a medium to do what she loved - bring information to people using a forum that is dedicated to all things medical. View all articles by Hridya.
